Friday, September 29, 2017

My Success

I've accomplished a lot in my life (so what other people say), which is true in a lot of ways. The crazy thing is those things don't define me at all. I graduated high school, college and worked for some of the biggest companies in this country and the world. I'm not gonna go naming companies because that's not what this blog is about. 

None of those jobs I've had even mattered and the one I have now doesn't matter to me either. I work for the biggest and most well-known hospital in the U.S. and it doesn't phase me. People make a big deal when they see my résumé but it doesn't matter to me. 

See Corporate America doesn't work for me, I don't fit in it and it doesn't fit into my life, my talents and goals. Corporate America to me is monotony, there's no change (maybe in company policies or departmental changes) but in hindsight, it's the same routine every. fucking. day. Waking up at the same time and doing the same routines. Basically being a programmed robot.

My biggest success and accomplishment in my life was writing and publishing my first book. The Struggles and Growth of a Man was the game changer to my life. That's when I realized my purpose in life. It's to inspire, motivate and empower others and to break people out of societal standards and expectations. It's to get people to think about themselves, their lives, the environment they live in and to stop their bad thinking habits.

With every book that followed, to me, that was more success. With every new book idea, that's success. With every small poem I write, that's success. With every person that I reach and get to critically think about life, I've done my job. Some days I write, most I don't. I don't put pressure on myself to do it, which I why I very rarely get writer's block. My words just flow and I'm glad that my words can resonate with others.

Sometimes I lose track of my successes and forget that I'm impacting others. There isn't going to be any defining moment to me that says, "I'm successful." For me, it started the moment I brainstormed my first session on my first book and wrote about a character named Robert that relates to me and a lot of the struggles I deal with as a man in his 30s. Especially in a crazed world where your mind can drift all over the place because of a plethora of distractions daily. 

If I ever become a best selling author or I start getting recognized for my work and what I'm doing, that's when people will start saying that I'm successful. It's funny how life works and how the world manages to program and train your mind to think and define success as awards, accolades, being on a television screen or being heard behind a microphone. 

Everyone has their own definition of success, I've just learned and realized that I don't need a huge house, expensive cars and lavish this to show off to the world. I'm already successful, I just have the bigger goal of having millions of people reading my books and being impacted by my words. I honestly only want to take care of my parents, buy a townhome, drive a Genesis G70 and travel the world.

As mentally draining at this process is, it's worth it. I just would rather be focused on the journey everyday instead of some days. Having a full-time job cuts into a lot of what I'm trying to do and accomplish. But eventually I'll figure out how I can focus on my writing more and less on things that don't matter to me.

Don't let society determine what you think success is. Stay humble in the process and know that most people don't care and they only will when the light is shining on you. Not many will walk with you through the dark tunnel. 

Stay focused and take mental breaks when needed. 

Be good

Jamell Crouthers
Aquarianmind 

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